Recovering people pleaser? You are not alone. In this episode of The Miracle of Healing, I sit down with Brooklyn-based psychotherapist and author Tonya Lester to talk about her brand new book Push Back: Live, Love, and Work with Others Without Losing Yourself. Tonya is a go-to expert on relationships and communication, the writer behind the popular Staying Sane Inside Insanity blog for Psychology Today, and her work has been featured in The New York Times Modern Love column, The Guardian, Newsweek, Well and Good, HuffPo, and more.
Tonya makes a bold and refreshing case that it is okay to be difficult, not mean or rigid, but the good kind of difficult that lets the people in your life truly see you and understand what you need. We dig into why so many women suppress their own needs without even realizing it, how to engage in honest and productive conflict, and what it really takes to stand firm in your convictions without losing the relationships that matter most. If you have ever felt stuck in patterns of over-accommodating, smoothing things over, or shrinking yourself to keep the peace, this conversation is going to feel like permission and a roadmap rolled into one.
Key topics we cover:
- The good kind of difficult and what it actually looks like
- Over-functioning, shock absorbing, and shock magnets in relationships
- Perfectionism as anxiety in disguise and what to do about it
- Gaslighting and the best way to respond when it happens
- The difference between raging, collapsing, and pushing back
Learn more about Tonya at http://www.TonyaLester.com
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Books: The Art of Psychic Reiki, Energy Healing for Empaths, Awakening Your Psychic Abilities
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